El Rancho

- Giacomo Tramontagna, The Guide -

Somewhere in the rugged reaches of Kristen Bjorn country, Carlos Montenegro raises horses on a sun-kissed ranch. A sad-eyed hunk whose upscale frame is topped off with an expensively tousled head of jet-black hair, Montenegro is as much a walking luxury item as the thoroughbreds he breeds. (If he didn't exist, Emporio Armani would have had to invent him.) Alas, his outward perfection masks inner strife. When his firm-bodied wife makes advances in bed, Montenegro gives his brow an anguished backhanded slap. In voiceover, he admits she's interrupting his obsessive fantasies of "men from the country who surround me all strong and virile." In a narrative full of deadpan comic mischief and blistering sex, those dreams soon segue into reality. With the involvement of 21 mouth-watering, libido-quickening international models, El Rancho encompasses five finely tuned erotic set pieces. Much of the elaborately detailed action begins with discrete pairs of men who finally merge; the sex is expertly configured and beautifully shot. Montenegro is a key participant in three extended episodes. In the opening reverie, he fucks the tar out of David Vega on the porch of his estate, then assists at an orgy in which bearded, satyrish Jean Franko gets joyfully gang-banged. In the fourth sequence, Montenegro frolics with five of his friends while his wife shops; the fifth unfolds in an exclusive club where he and three fellow rancheros yank straining pingas out of their swanky dress trousers, then proceed in obvious directions. Two digressive sections shift focus to the proletariat. Aroused by the sight of Montenegro's mujer sensuously brushing her cranberry-hued locks on a terrace, a pair of ranch hands lunge for each other, then are joined by a third who becomes the centerpiece of a fuck-train. Meanwhile, at a guerrilla training camp in the hills, four rebels rehearse a repertoire of subversive gestures that include thigh-holster fetishism and a vertical 69. Although Kristen Bjorn's forte is group sex, some of the strongest vignettes in El Rancho are one-on-one. An exquisite encounter between off-screen partners Daniel Marvin and Pedro Andreas includes ecstatic, reciprocal condomless fucking. This and other stunning vignettes are available only in the mail-order version, which tops three hours and completely earns its length.

Stunning vignettes! Rating: 4 stars

 


- Martin Cox, Mannet -

At this point in his long, innovative, and completely successful career, no one should doubt that the great Kristen Bjorn understands structure, and how to build a scene to a crashing climax. In El Rancho, he outdoes himself, creating an almost symphonic opening act, in which stunner Carlos Montenegro is elevated to center stage. Carlos, naked in bed next to his sexually frustrated wife, dreams only of the hombres who he sees on his horse ranch, and not her. It's easy to understand the poor lady's dilemma. This quintet of handsome, muscular, typically Bjorn-gorgeous men, perform in pairs and threes and the action is anything but repetitive or formulaic.

Jean Franko and his paramour Tommy Alvarez bring us the first cum-shots, delivered after a brief oral encounter, and Tommy blasts his like a rocket shot, an action he repeats later after some highly athletic fucking. Elsewhere, dark and handsome Murat Cipiere and beautiful Carlos Dispone are sucking and fucking their way to glory, and the scene ends with a hot sit-fuck delivered compliments of Carlos's enormous cock. Next, the other Carlos (Montenegro) gets some of that man-meat he's hungry for, in the form or blond hottie David Vega. David feeds Carlos his rock-hard cock and later, when David gives Carlos the same treatment, Carlos spews on David's smooth pecs. The fuck sequence in this scene is just as breathtaking as the opening oral action, with Carlos driving into David sideways, burying his cock deep in David's hole. Just as more cum is spilled, the actors of the preceding scenes arrive, and a six-man orgy ensues, and Jean becomes the object of a sensational gangbang climax.

The libidos on this ranch are far from satisfied after that opening volley. Two workers pass by as the lady of the house is airing out her -- um, naturally orange locks, and one of those men, beautiful Rocky Oliveira, uses his seductive patter on blond Peter Pauer to get into his pants. If you were her, he'd kiss you like this, and then suck your dick, more or less. Peter turns to jelly (well, not every part of him) at Rocky's charms, and soon the mutual suck session the two enjoy has Rocky spilling on Peter's perfect pecs. But as often happens when two men fuck in public (in gay porn, anyway), the two are being watched, by ultra-hung stud Ricardo Safado. Ricardo's massive meat finds its way into both dudes' mouths, and later he blows a load on Rocky's chest. Fucking in the scene is really well done, from Ricardo's slow invasion of Peter's taut ass to a scene later where Rocky rides Peter. This segment ends a stunner cum-shot, Rocky blowing a load into Ricardo's mouth, and Ricardo leaning in to lick up the jism. And yet, the action isn't done. Before we wave goodbye to this red-hot trio, they have one more trick to show us, a three-way fuck, with adorable Ricardo in the middle, gyrating his hips so that he can feel the bulk of Peter's dick in his ass as he fucks Rocky.

If ranch life seems a bit bucolic, not to worry, there's a guerrilla training camp just a stone's throw away, so how about a little political intrigue? Plus, there's the sight of hunky Alex Ferrari naked except for a thigh holster, surely enough to warm the cockles of any NRA member's heart. Alex plays with hottie Fabian Andrade in a dark, dank, basement, but the oral action between these two certainly warms things up well. When Alex rides Fabian's pole, the camera gets an ultra-tight angle of the action. In another part of the compound, two very athletic blonds, Mike Gonda and Tibor Cernan, are kickboxing up a storm, and then they show off in a stand-up 69. It's one of the most impressively gymnastic suck sessions I've ever seen. That warm-up is followed by a tabletop fuck that is almost tame by comparison (but still enthralling). Since these four separatists have been working so hard all day, they deserve the four-man orgy that follows in a water-filled grotto. The dudes manage some truly incredible action, and as the water drifts lazily by, it's surface is soon covered with multiple loads of cum.

Back at the ranch, another group of hotties has arrived on horseback. Carlos really knows how to pick them, most notably stunners Daniel Martin and Pedro Andreas. Before we get to them, though, we're entertained by a steamy three-way with blond hunk Peter Berg, Jorge Ballantinos and Tony Duke. Peter goes down on his two ranch hands in turn, and later he splays his legs wide apart for a hard fuck delivered by Tony. Tony plows Peter until he pulls out and gushes all over Peter's creamy ass, and then he eats his load away, diving deep between Peter's smooth, freshly-fucked asscheeks, getting every drop. Next up are Daniel and Pedro, who do it all, and I mean all: open-mouthed cum-shots, snowballing, and then a sans condom flip-flop fuck. Watching the two of them display their obvious passion for each other makes this scene riveting. The next part of this segment brings all five guys together, and Daniel and Pedro (dicks sheathed this time) fuck side-by-side, Pedro in Jorge, Daniel in Tony, with an occasional oral assist from Peter. Peter gets his reward for this later, in a double-fuck by the two lovers. As cum is being sprayed everywhere at the end of the scene, Carlos strolls in wearing nothing but a tiny bikini, his huge dick barely concealed. He gets dunked in a swimming pool next, but if I were around I'd want anything but for Carlos to cool down. The thing is, of course, he doesn't, thanks to the amazingly hot cohorts around him. Lifting Carlos high above the water, the studs eat his ass, suck his dick, kiss him, making sure, apparently, that his wife will never have the chance to feel his dick again. The scene ends with all six studs standing naked in a semicircle, beating off, and it is one of the more memorable views in the entire production.

The final sequence has Matthias Vannelli, Jordi Casal and Alex Brinski, and our hero Carlos relaxing in business suits at the rancher's club. Soon enough, comparisons are made, and I'm not talking about how many head of cattle they each own. Once their cocks are out of their flies, it's easy to see that no one in this group has anything to be ashamed of, and Alex is on his knees getting a closer look -- and taste. Alex's gorgeous ass gets tongued, and then he sits on Jordi's cock and bounces on it. If you've ever had even a slight fetish for business suits and ties, then you're going to love the way Carlos and Matthias wrap their silk ones around their dicks and balls, like an expensively colorful pair of cockrings. Bending over a table, their asses fully exposed, they are treated to side-by-side rimjobs from Jordi and Alex. Handsome Jordi then gets on all-fours and takes it from Matthias as the others watch and stroke their cocks, and then Jordi gets the ultimate prize: Carlos' muscled ass. I could watch these two Adonises fuck all day, but the action is even more enhanced by Matthias pronging Alex nearby. Carlos gets the love bug, thanks to Jordi, and he takes him back to the ranch for more. The two suck each other until Carlos cums, but they are caught in the act by the flame-haired Cristina, and she makes a big scene. Still, nothing she does is quite so jaw-dropping as the mere sight of a naked Carlos, on the steps of the ranch, his muscles gleaming in the sun as Cristina stalks away. Guess this means that at least Carlos won't have to be on the down-low any more.

Rating: *** Highly, Highly Recommended ***

 


- Brady Jansen, Adult Video News -

A sculpted god among men, Carlos Montenegro plays a rancher who raises thoroughbreds—and also feels incomplete with his wife. He starts to lust after the men who surround his countryside estate, with his dreams so strong that they overtake reality. This is quintessential Kristen Bjorn at work, complete with stunning sets and outdoor locations. There’s also the typical huge amount of hard dick and multiple squirts in each scene. Highlights include a first-rate fuck chain with Ricardo Safado gyrating his ass between Peter Pauer and Rocky Oliveira. That threesome starts with a fantastic Pre-Nom for Best Oral Scene, where Safado gets his monster cock (seriously, it’s huge) serviced by his two co-stars, their mouths stretched to the limit as they slurp it up. The first scene starts with three separate couples that come together for a six-man orgy at the end, with verbal Jean Franko—oozing intensity and passion, as usual—getting fucked. Two more couples converge for a four-man scene in a green-lit indoor pool, followed by a twosome (the bonus scene, with condom-free fucking, on the mail order version) and threesome that combine for another orgy led by the stunningly handsome Pedro Andreas and his gorgeous dick. The scene includes a double penetration, and is followed by another four-man scene in which Montenegro lets loose. Bjorn makes it look so easy, you almost forget how rare this kind of quality porn is. Bursting with chemistry, this is another worthy addition to his canon.

"Quintessential Kristen Bjorn at work" Rating: FIVE STARS.

 

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